Yours Eternally
by SLovingLecter
Summary: A clearly wealthy but anonymous benefactor begins sending Bella gifts, the notes are never signed with anything other than 'Yours Eternally.' But they fill her with curiosity and she longs to know who her secret admirer is.
1. Chapter 1

I blinked sleep from my eyes as a car horn sounded below my window and I couldn't help the happy smile that stretched my lips as I awoke from my first good nights sleep in months. I was home, in Forks and so were the Cullen's, I had finally woken from the nightmare that had plagued me for what felt like forever. Edward still loved me, he'd never stopped; only lied to me about it so I could have what he believed to be a normal human life. Would he ever understand that he _was_ my life?

The horn sounded again as I stretched sleepily and looked over at the alarm clock on my side table, if I didn't move I was going to be late for school. I pulled myself from the warm bedsheets and went in search of a towel to have a shower, Charlie had never been good at laundry.

Half an hour later I rushed down the stairs with my half-wet hair tied up in a ponytail, the still damp strands of hair slapped against my cheeks as Charlie called my name and I turned quickly to face him.

"A letter and package for you Bells, i'm guessing its from _him_." Charlie said moodily, he still wasn't happy that the Cullen's had returned and had grounded me indefinitely until I could prove I wouldn't run off again like that.

I turned back toward the kitchen sideboard and picked up the letter and package, it was wrapped in brown paper. I frowned as I looked at the beautiful handwriting upon the front of the letter, it simply read 'Isabella.'

"Where did you find this, dad?" I asked, sure now that it wasn't from Edward. Not only did he rarely call me by my full first name but i'd seen his handwriting a thousand times; I sat next to him enough at school. His was a cramped yet elegant scrawl, but it couldn't compare to the pure artistry of the writing in front of me.

"It was on the porch step." He grumbled and walked out of the kitchen, grabbing his hat and coat before storming out the house and slamming the door noisily behind him.

I felt trepidation enter my stomach as I realised Edward was waiting for me and Charlie had yet to confront him for abandoning me. I quickly grabbed the package and letter and ran upstairs, I threw it haphazardly upon my bed, only seeing it bounce once as I ran out the door and back down the stairs. I was panting by the time I reached the front door and rubbing the elbow i'd smashed into the wall on my way down the stairs.

"Im so unfit." I mumbled under my breath to myself as I opened to door to see Charlie stood toe to toe with Edward, his voice raised.

"Do you even understand what you put her through?!" He half shouted as I ran between them, my hand on Charlie's arm in what was meant to be a comforting gesture.

"Dad, stop." I said, glaring at him. I wouldn't let him say anything that could drive Edward away again, i'd only just got him back.

"Yes Chief Swan, I do. I'm working my hardest to earn Bella's forgiveness and I hope that I can also earn yours." Edward said dutifully, his head bowed in shame.

Charlie merely scoffed and turned on his heel toward his police cruiser, his shoulders were stiff with tension as he got in and slammed the door behind him.

"He really isn't going to forgive me." Edward said as he wrapped an arm around my waist, his fingers splaying over my him and I sighed happily to feel his touch again.

"He will calm down eventually." I said, turning toward him and being swept away in his beautiful golden eyes. Just like that all thoughts of the package I had been so concerned about were swept away in my admiration of Edward Cullen.

Hours later, once I had returned home from school and sadly said goodbye to Edward for the rest of the day, I entered my bedroom to see the package and letter I had completely forgotten about this morning laying innocuously on its side where I had thrown it. I closed my door and dropped my bag on the floor at the foot of my bed, I tucked one foot under my leg and sat on my mattress in front of the brown paper, studying it in confusion.

Who would have dropped a package off at my _house_? There were no stamps or a postal address, for a moment I feared Victoria was behind it, then I realised a letter was entirely too subtle for her.

'_Well,__ Bella_' I thought to myself. '_It's not going to open itself.'_

I tore at the corner of the envelope, feeling momentarily sad that I was having to destroy the beautiful paper. Inside was a thick, expensive feeling parchment and I could see the black ink left no smudge marks, I held my breath as I read.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_I know this may come as a shock to you and so I must immediately beg your forgiveness for causing such an emotion before I continue, but you see I couldn't help but write to you. You do not know me, but I have gazed upon your beauty and haven't been able to shift you from my thoughts since. _

_I wanted to write to you so that you knew someone appreciated you for what you truly are; a marvel. Whatever course your life is leading you on, may it be good or bad. I wanted you to feel wanted. It wounds me to imagine you unhappy and so I hope that these letters will be a source of comfort to you. Yes, I said letters. I will continue to write to you, do not worry I do not expect a reply and nor will I provide you with a means of doing so, just knowing that you are reading these words is reply enough for me. _

_Please do not feel scared or threatened in any way, my hope is not to cause you discomfort but quite the opposite. I promise I am not watching you, stalking you or in any way threatening your safety or well being. I am merely a friend wishing you well and hoping that I can bring a small amount of happiness into your life with a few written words and small gifts. Please do not worry about their monetary value and they are yours to do with as you wish, I promise not to be offended. _

_Yours Eternally._

_P.S I imagine the sapphire will compliment your complexion and hair perfectly, I hope you like it._

I breathed out quickly and bit my lip in anxiety as I tore at the paper of the package, dreading what would be within. A deep maroon leather jewellery box lay harmlessly encompassed by the brown paper. It looked up at me accusingly and I felt my heart rate pick up. What was this about? Who was sending this? Whoever it was promised they weren't stalking me, but who did things like this just to make someone happy?

I gingerly opened the large box and laying within the black velvet was the most beautiful necklace I had ever seen. A long silver chain held the sapphire the letter had been talking about, its blue was so deep it reminded me of the ocean. The stone was tear shaped and as I pulled it over my head I realised the chain was so long that the stone would easily be hidden under my clothes as I could feel it touching the top of my ribcage. I dreaded to think how much this had cost and hoped that It wasn't a _real_ sapphire, but the weight and quality of the stone begged to differ.

I didn't know why but I felt inexplicably attached to this necklace and letter, whoever this person was all they cared for was my wellbeing and whilst I had initially felt scared, I didn't now. I couldn't explain it and the change in my emotions confused me. I stroked the stone reverently before tucking it under my blouse, It wouldn't do for Edward to notice it but I didn't want to take it off. Something so beautiful demanded to be worn.

I froze and a frown creased my forehead. Why did I automatically assume that I would need to hide this from Edward? Because I didn't want him to know about it, or the letter. I shook my head as if to disperse the confusing thoughts that were all vying for my attention. Why I wanted to hide it didn't matter, but I knew that I had to. I stood quickly from my bed and took the package, letter and paper with me to the desk in the corner of the room. I unlocked the bottom drawer and hid the items inside there, making sure to remove the key and hide that inside my dresser. I didn't think Edward snooped around my room, but there was no harm in taking extra precautions.

I stroked the chain again and found myself smiling, this wasn't the type of jewellery made to sit in a drawer and get dusty, so I decided to wear it and if Edward asked; I would tell him it was a gift. I wasn't lying after all. Was I?

A/N: Yes ANOTHER one. Every Captive Soul is coming to a close and I couldn't say goodbye to my favourite pairing just yet. So here you have this. Let me know what you think so far.


	2. Chapter 2

Time had passed all too quickly since I had gotten Edward and the Cullen's back, it felt like the last few months had flown by in the blink of an eye and summer had faded all too quickly. Edward had noticed my necklace the day after I had begun wearing it and whilst he never commented on it, I would sometimes catch him staring at the chain with a strange expression on his beautiful face. I was too scared to ask him about it, scared that I would lose him again If I openly acknowledged that I was wearing a gift from a total stranger.

I had tried to quell the disappointment inside me as week after week passed and still no new package or letter had arrived. Apparently my admirer had grown bored very quickly, I tried not to examine the hurt I felt too closely.

It was the evening before my birthday and whilst Alice had promised me no more birthday parties after the total failure of my eighteenth, I still didn't trust her to let the day pass unnoticed. I huffed out a breath and with it whispered the age I was to become tomorrow. "Nineteen…" I felt a pang in my chest as I thought about it, I would be two years older than Edward who would remain forever frozen at seventeen. Upon our return from Italy we all had a meeting about the prospect of my becoming a Vampire. It was now non-negotiable due to the Volturi knowing about my existence. Edward however had managed to persuade his family to side with him yet again, saying that he wasn't ready to condemn me.

I had stopped pushing the issue when the first slithers of doubt had begun to creep into my mind. Edward had left me before and whilst he maintained it was the hardest thing he'd ever done I couldn't quite shake the feeling that something wasn't right. I loved Edward, of that I was absolutely certain. But I now wasn't entirely sure I wanted to be a Vampire and for the life of me couldn't explain why i'd had such a dramatic change of heart. I didn't want to be a teenager forever, in fact I couldn't think of anything worse. My teenage years so far had been the most difficult and socially awkward years of my life, and whilst I wasn't quite there yet I could see the changes age was making to me, mind, body and soul. I was no longer falling over quite as much and confidence grew within me every day, my body was changing too. Whilst my waist still remained small my hips and thighs became more shapely and less boyish, I was starting to feel like a woman and I didn't want to halt the process before it had really began.

Graduation had been and gone and I still hadn't found a permanent job. Charlie didn't nag me and for that I was grateful, he earned enough as police chief to not need any contributions toward the house but I knew that if I wanted to save any money I would need to find work somewhere. I was surfing the local job adverts online when I felt a breeze prickle the hairs on the back of my neck and a wide grin spread across my face. I span in my chair and stood to greet Edward, who leant against the window he had just entered through.

"Hi." I said, wrapping my arms around his neck and leaning up to press my lips to his. Before I had chance though he intercepted my arms and untangled them from his shoulders before placing them down by my sides.

"I need to talk to you." His voice was serious and I felt panic shoot through me as I remembered the last serious talk we'd had.

I shook my head roughly and backed away from him, lowering myself to my bed as shock coursed through my system. "No, no, no you can't do this to me again." I said, feeling like the ground was crumbling beneath me.

He was at my side in an instant. "Bella no, stop. I'm not leaving you, i'm right here. I promised i'd never leave you again and I wont, I swear. Not until you order me away."

I felt the panic recede and took a shaking breath as my eyes focussed on him again and the panic attack faded.

"I need to talk to you because i've been dishonest." He bowed his beautiful bronze haired head in regret before raising his golden eyes to meet mine again. "I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I kept this from you."

I frowned in confusion and just looked at him, not quite sure what he was talking about. "What do you mean?" I asked, hoping to prompt him into telling me whatever it was he was so concerned about.

"I've been intercepting your mail…" He bowed his head again as he turned away from my reaction. All I could do was blink as comprehension dawned on me. _Thats_ why I hadn't received any letters from the admirer who had promised to continue writing to me.

"Okay?" I was waiting for him to elaborate but instead he reached into his jacket pocket and withdrew a fist full of letters wrapped in an elastic band. The beautiful, artistic writing graced the front of every single one of them, the elegance with which my name was written almost made me appreciate it in its full length.

"There are packages… gifts in the car." He mumbled, has fingers lingered on the envelopes as he withdrew his hand.

"Why did you take them?" I asked him, feeling eagerness for the conversation to be over so I could open the letters begin to overwhelm me.

"I was jealous, I wanted to know who it was. After I saw the necklace you wont remove I had to know… But I couldn't open them. I couldn't betray your trust like that, so i've returned them to you. I hope that when you feel able, you will share their contents with me." I could tell he was hopeful that i'd open them now in front of him, but I wouldn't. I would never tell him what they said, they were _my_ letters. The one secret I had from him and the one thing in my life that didn't revolve around him. If i'd learnt anything from his leaving me it was that I couldn't be totally dependent on Edward Cullen for happiness.

"I need time to think, Edward. Please bring the packages up and then leave. I'll see you tomorrow." I said as softly as I could when anger was building up inside of me. How dare he take my letters? The thought that they had been sat unread in his room or car made me furious and I couldn't explain why. All I knew was that whoever sent them had intended for me to read them weeks ago and I hadn't been able to.

Edward had left and deposited the packages on my bed in the blink of an eye. Lingering at the window only to apologise before he leapt from it and disappeared into the night. I stood whilst trying to ignore the temptation of ripping into them right away before closing the window. I made sure to put the latch on so that I wouldn't have any surprise visitors in the night who might think it their right to read through the letters once they were opened.

I stroked my finger over the writing on what I deemed to be the oldest letter in the pile, I was trying to read through them in order and hoped I was getting it right.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_I am humbled beyond words that you accepted my gift and wear it with such pride, I was right; the sapphire suits you beautifully. A mere week has passed since my last letter but I couldn't resist writing you another after seeing your acceptance of this correspondence displayed so publicly._

_Your graduation fast approaches and though it is not my right, I have enclosed a gift I hope you will wear on the day. I understand that the graduation gowns are to be yellow, for that I apologise to you as I know your distaste for wearing bright, garish colours. I hope that my gift is understated enough to sooth your soul and make the day more bearable._

_You have my fondest congratulations and the best of wishes for the future. Enjoy the day Isabella, moments in life where you can truly be proud of your own achievements are few and far between; do not waste it._

_Yours Eternally._

My eyes scanned the bed for a small package and found one wrapped in similar paper to that the letter was enclosed in. I opened it carefully wanting to save everything from this person who valued my well being so highly. I let out a small gasp of shock as I opened the small box; more jewellery. Within the velvet this time lay a pair of tiny drop earrings holding the most delicate pearls I had ever seen, I pictured my graduation outfit and how awkward I had felt and was angry that Edward had taken this gift away from me. They would have indeed made the day much easier and I felt sad that I didn't get to wear them as my secret friend had hoped. I moved the letter and earrings to one side, stroking the pearls fondly before I moved onto the next letter.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_Forgive me if my last missive offended you, perhaps I was too presumptuous to assume that you would like receiving such a gift. As you didn't wear them to your graduation I will assume that they weren't as welcome as i'd hoped they would be, please forgive me. _

_I find myself at somewhat of a loss now as my first gift was so well received, it has confused me that the second was not. Are you perhaps not a fan of pearls? I will endeavour to select a more appropriate gift next time._

_Yours Eternally._

I felt my heart drop like a stone as I read through this letter, I could practically feel the disappointment radiating from the paper before me and frustrated tears welled in my eyes. "I'm sorry! I didn't get it, I couldn't wear them!" I spoke aloud to no one in particular, voicing my frustration as I gripped the letter in my hands.

It never occurred to me to feel worried that this person knew my graduation gown was yellow, or had watched me closely enough to know that I hadn't worn the pearls. I was being watched by so many people, what was one more thrown into the mix?

_A/N: Please remember to review, as this is a new story it is the reviews that keep me writing._


	3. Chapter 3

My greedy hands snatched for the next letter and just before I opened it I noticed a date had been written on the back of the envelope in the same handwriting I was becoming so familiar with. It was dated a month ago. Why had he began dating the letters? I referred to him as a 'he' but for all I knew it could be a woman, I wrinkled my nose in distaste at the thought. Had he known that I wasn't receiving them, but that when I eventually did I would want to read them in order?

I opened it carefully and stroked the thick paper between my fingertips as I read.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_I have refrained from writing to you for a month now as it has come to my attention that you aren__'__t receiving your letters, but I could deny myself no longer. I believe that the person intercepting these will not read them as to do so would be a great betrayal of your trust, and so I have decided to continue writing in the hope that you will eventually receive them._

_I beg of you to forgive the emotional tone of my last letter, now that I know you hadn__'__t received my gift I bear you no ill will for not wearing them. It appears that when it comes to you my judgement is askew._

_Life for me has been mundane and dreary these last weeks without the opportunity to see you brightening my existence. I do not wish to frighten you though, or arouse the suspicions of your protectors any more than I have already. So I will refrain._

_Know that I think of you often._

_Yours Eternally._

I felt my heart flutter in my chest as I re-read the last sentence again and again.

'_Know that I think of you often_.'

Part of me wondered how this person knew the things he spoke of in his letters, but I didn't feel afraid, only frustrated that he had been so close but I hadn't noticed him.

Almost automatically I reached for the next letter.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_Still your so-called protector intercepts these letters but refuses to read them. Do you think it tortures him to be so close to the truth but so unable to pass that final threshold? I think so._

_But let us not talk about him. _

_I hope you are finding things with which to occupy yourself after your graduation, employment perhaps? I do not know as I have been kept away from you on business. Sometimes I wonder what you would write back to me if I gave you a means of doing so, but for now I think things are best left as they are. _

_The sun is beautiful here and I often find myself wondering how it would change the colours in your hair, were you stood under its rays. I think I will have to return to you soon, my life without you in it even in the smallest of ways; is incredibly dull._

_As always I am_

_Yours Eternally._

As excitement and butterflies flooded my stomach I wondered if I should feel guilty about feeling such a way toward a total stranger. Wasn't it a betrayal of Edward's love to be feeling like this about someone who I had never met? I couldn't help it though. The way he composed his letters to me were so beautiful and emotive that the bookworm within me had fallen after the very first letter, I think.

I looked at my bed and felt an overwhelming wave of sadness crash over me as I viewed the last letter and package on my bed. I almost didn't want to read it because then it would be over. Still, I tore the envelope open carefully and pulled the package toward me as I read.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_I grow frustrated at your beaus lack of action, to know that I am writing these letters but still you are not receiving them irritates me beyond recognition. I can only hope that he decides soon. For now I will continue to write to you like this, only hoping that when you finally receive them you understand that I have not abandoned you. _

_Soon it is to be your nineteenth birthday, It is an important birthday indeed. So I have enclosed a gift appropriate for the occasion and hope that you forgive my spoiling you, I simply cannot restrain myself. _

_I noticed your appreciation for fine literature and as I have come to understand you are not a woman who wears much jewellery, I opted for a different type of gift this time. _

_Know that I envy my gift for being held by you, even before you have done so._

_I remain_

_Yours Eternally._

I sighed appreciatively as affection for this stranger bubbled within me, he really was a fine artist when it came to the written word. I had been holding the package as I read and at first its weight had confused me, but now that I had read the letter through in its entirety its weightiness made sense. I unfolded the brown paper carefully and a small note fell from within the yellowed pages of the book I had yet to look at properly. The note read:

_Many happy returns, dearest one. I would have written so within the first page of the book, but did not wish to depreciate its value should you choose to sell it on. As I maintained in my first letter these gifts are yours to do with as you wish and I will not feel offended if you would prefer the money to spend as you desire. Somehow though, __I__ don__'__t believe you will. Especially not with this particular gift-_

_Happy birthday._

I looked back at the book, it was absolutely beautiful. It was bound in tan calf and gilded up the spine in rich golds and reds, the very feel of it was expensive. I opened it gently, appreciating the creak of the binding and the smell of the pages as my eyes scanned over the printed writing on the first page.

**JANE EYRE: An Autobiography. Edited By Currer Bell**

**London Smith, Elder and Co 1847**

I held my breath as I gazed at the page, dumbstruck. How did he know?! I felt lightheaded and so forced myself to breathe as I gently flicked through the pages of the pristine book before me. I couldn't believe it. A first edition copy of Jane Eyre, my favourite book, this must have cost an absolute fortune! I placed the book down gently before running to my computer and doing a quick google search, I held my hand against my gaping mouth as the first search results popped up.

$53,350.00 USD

Is he insane?!

I tried to calm myself as I hyperventilated and glanced between the computer screen and the book which laid quite innocently on my bed. I couldn't accept such a gift, could I? I had always wanted a first edition copy of Jane Eyre, since I had first read and fell in love with the characters within the pages.

I returned to the letter and the envelope which it had been encased in. The date on the back was today. Edward must have intercepted this one just before coming to see me, clearly the guilt of keeping a birthday gift from me outweighed his jealousy.

I quickly pulled my journal toward me, one I used for jotting down notes here and there. The paper was nowhere near to his standards but I felt that I had to speak to him somehow. I cringed at the sloppiness of my handwriting when compared to his, hoping he wouldn't find it too difficult to read as I began my own letter.

_To… Whoever you are?_

_Well,__ this is awkward, I've only just began my letter and I don't even know how I should address you. I apologise for my handwriting, compared to yours it must be barely legible. I have only just received your gifts and letters and after opening the one intended for my birthday I felt like I had to write you a letter of my own._

_I don't even know how to begin to express my thanks for the book. It is absolutely beautiful and I have wanted one for as long as I can remember, but I cannot accept such an extravagant gift. No one has ever spent that much money on me, let alone a stranger._

_I don't want to leave it outside with this letter, in case it gets damaged. Please respond with an appropriate place to leave it so that you can retrieve it, undamaged._

_Thank you for the lovely letters and gifts, i'm so sorry I couldn't wear the pearls to my graduation. You are right, they would have cheered me up immensely._

_Bella Swan._

I quickly re-read my rough note through, It was hideously rushed compared to his but It would have to do. I snatched it up and quietly trod downstairs and into Charlie's home office, he was currently snoring on the couch in front of the football. As I searched for an envelope I realised how ridiculous it was that I was trying to hide such an action from Charlie, he wouldn't mind that I used one. I just didn't want to have to explain what I was using it for.

Once I found one I stuffed it in the envelope quickly and sealed it with some sticky tape, I had always hated to lick them and didn't want to take the chance that Edward would open it and reseal it whilst it was still wet. This way if it was opened there was no way of hiding it.

I tiptoed to the front door and out onto the porch, as I closed the door behind me and breathed in the cool night air I realised I was in pyjama shorts. I felt heat suffuse my cheeks at the thought of being watched by him whilst looking like this. My eyes scanned the tree line for a long time before I came away disappointed and placed the letter on the wood which still felt warm beneath my bare toes. This was where Charlie had found my first letter, so I could only hope that this was where Edward had found the rest of them, and that my friend, whoever he was, would find my note to him.

_A/N: Again, please review._


	4. Chapter 4

I barely slept that night as excitement filled the pit of my stomach and made me toss and turn in bed, unable to fall asleep. I couldn't help but wonder if he was outside, if he had already seen my letter, or if he wouldn't see it at all and It would still be laying in the same place i'd left it when I went out in the morning. I barely manage to restrain myself from running over to the window and craning my neck to see if the envelope was still there.

When I did finally fall asleep, it didn't last very long. I was awake before the sun had properly risen in the sky and ran down the stairs as quietly as I could. I flung the door open and felt disappointment make my stomach sink as my letter sat in the same spot on the porch step. I frowned at the offending piece of paper, tempted to leave it outside but didn't wanting anyone else to find it. After all I had signed it with my full name. I stepped forward to retrieve it, but as I bent down in noticed that the lip of the envelope was fluttering in the breeze… It had been opened! I snatched the envelope up and glanced inside, my letter was gone and in its place was the beautiful, thick paper I was now so used to seeing.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_Do not fret about your letter composing skills or the artistry of the writing within, I find everything about you beautiful and your letter was no exception. _

_Come now, to hear you describe me as a stranger wounds me deeply. Are we not friends Isabella? I gave you that book as a gift between friends, it has sat in my private collection for some time and I felt that it deserved to be read. So do not think on the money I spent as it was a family heirloom and when it was originally bought, was worth less than a cup of your terrible American coffee is now._

_I will not accept the book__'__s return and instead trust you with its safekeeping, I can trust you can__'__t I Isabella?_

_Please do not apologise for not receiving my correspondence, the fault does not lie with you and even if it did I would not seek an apology from you. I am pleased you like my gifts and letters though I must say, i__'__m not entirely sure I can continue writing to you without hoping for a reply now that I have received one._

_As for what to call me__… __How about Rochester?_

_Yours Eternally._

I snorted in amusement as I read his last line, before realising that I was stood outside in my nightclothes very early in the morning clutching a letter and laughing to myself. I quickly stepped inside and took the letter upstairs with me. I couldn't believe he had replied, I could feel the anticipation prickling my scalp as I sat down to write a reply of my own; not feeling in control of my hand as it replied almost without my permission.

_To__…_

_Rochester, really? Are you a tall and dark man with unconventionally handsome features? Do you live in a castle with none but your loyal staff to serve you? _

_I__'__m sorry, I didn__'__t mean to upset you. We are friends, of a sort. It seems that you know everything about me but I know very little about you, as such you seem a stranger to me. _

_The book is over one hundred and fifty years old, it must be of great sentimental value to your family if it has been passed down over so many years, I would feel awful knowing i__'__d deprived generations to come of their inheritance. I will keep it safe for you though, until such a time as it finds its way back into your collection. You can trust me._

_Please don't stop writing to me, I could continue to reply to you, if you__'__d like? _

_Bella _

_P.S- __'__Your terrible American coffee__'… __I take this to mean that you aren__'__t American then?_

I sealed the letter and placed it on my desk whilst I dressed. Today was going to be a beautiful day and it seemed like a shame to let the good weather and a fantastic book to go to waste. Besides, If I sat out on the porch and read I could keep an eye on whoever was picking my letters up.

A few hours later I was a quarter of the way through Jane Eyre and still my letter remained untouched. I wriggled my toes in the rare sunshine as I sat in the warmth of the porch chair, my eyes continuously flicked from the pages of the book to the letter, which was blindingly white in the sun.

I heard an engine purr and glanced up to see the familiar silver Volvo approaching. I frowned as Edwards car approached and parked in my drive, he beckoned at me from the seat and I shook my head, knowing full well he couldn't step into the sunlight without exposing himself. Even though Charlie had long since gone to work, you could never be too sure who was looking.

I ignored Edward's scowling face and returned to my book, only noticing it had turned colder hours later because the clouds had returned to steal the sun away.

I heard Edwards car door close and grimaced, he was safe now that the sun was hidden behind the dense grey clouds. He approached me warily before sitting with unnatural grace in the chair next to mine.

I ignored him and continued to read.

"Bella, I'm sorry."

I glanced up at him once before returning my gaze to the book. He waited in silence as I reached the end of the chapter, took note of the page number and closed the book. "Why are you here?" I asked, looking mournfully up at the sky as it darkened, threatening to unleash its wrath upon Forks.

"I came to see you, to see what the letters said." I turned to look at him and caught his gaze as it flicked away from my reply that still laid upon the porch steps. "What is that?" He asked.

"A letter." I said sarcastically, knowing that wasn't the answer he was looking for.

"Bella I'm sorry for invading your privacy, I really am; but I had to be sure you were safe. These letters could be from anyone." His sweet voice pleaded with me to forgive him and I felt my irritation with him begin to subside.

"If someone wanted to hurt me, they wouldn't send me a letter." I looked down at him condescendingly. "That is my reply, to thank whoever is sending me these letters, for my birthday gift."

His eyes glanced down at the book in my hands before his eyebrows furrowed and his lips formed a pout. "So I'm not allowed to celebrate your birthday with you, but someone you don't even know is?"

I rolled my eyes. "I don't mind celebrating my birthday anymore."

He frowned at me in confusion, hurt glistening in his golden eyes as he stood. "Happy Birthday, Bella." He bent and placed a kiss upon my forehead, his lips were cold and I felt like they were sucking away the last warmth my skin held from the sun. I shivered and he frowned again, somehow making an expression that wasn't meant to hold any beauty look appealing, before returning to his car.

As he left I sighed and pulled the blanket from the back of the chair to wrap around my shoulders and keep me warm. I laid my head back and closed my eyes, feeling exhausted from the conflicted emotions that warred within my head.

I must've fallen asleep, for when I woke the air smelled like rain and the ground was wet. I blinked blearily and looked over to the porch step for what felt like the millionth time, a jolt ran through me as I realised my letter was gone. My first thought was that Edward had taken it, but then when I looked down to my lap to check that the book was ok and hadn't been ruined by the rain I noticed a letter sat upon its pages. My name was elegantly written upon the front.

He had retrieved the letter whilst I slept on the porch. He had been right in front of me and I had missed it. I felt annoyance bubble within me as I uselessly scanned the tree line again before opening the letter and gathering the blanket around me.

_Dearest Isabella,_

_You do not know how frighteningly accurate your mocking assessment of me is, but i__'__m afraid I cannot tell you anything of importance about me. The idea of being anonymous is that you remain so. Still, I hope that we can remain friends even if you don__'__t know everything about me. If you ask me a question I will tell you what I can, does that help?_

_The book previously held no sentimental value to me at all, but now that I have watched it slip from your grasp as you fall into slumber I find myself somewhat attached to it, as I am to its keeper. Please do not worry about depriving anyone from reading it, it is where it belongs._

_Your replies would mean the world to me but I fear our bond would only grow over mutual correspondence and I would become irrevocably fond of you. Would that frighten you?_

_Ah, your first question! No, I am not American. _

_I await your reply anxiously,_

_Yours Eternally._

I smiled down at the letter and sighed softly before raising my eyes to the tree line again, scanning once more before I headed inside. I could have sworn I felt the prickle of hairs stand up on the back of my neck as I walked away, the feeling I usually only got when I was being watched.

_A/N: Please don__'__t forget to review, your feedback is my muse._


	5. Chapter 5

_My friend,_

_I hope my address to you answers your first question, but just in case it doesn't I will clarify for you, we can remain friends, even if you wont tell me the answers to the most basic of questions… What is your favourite color?_

_You have such a way with words, you make falling asleep outside in the rain sound appealing. I will trust your judgement though and as I stated before, will take care of the book until you wish to take it back. _

_It wouldn't frighten me to have a friend who cares for me. I have witnessed so many frightening things that having someone there for me makes me feel the opposite. _

_Not American… Will you tell me where you're from?_

_Bella._

I scanned the letter once more before folding it and placing it within its envelope, this time with a little more restraint than I had with my first reply. For the first time since this began I allowed myself to sit and examine my feelings on the subject. I could feel myself drifting away from Edward, after so long mourning his absence I had gone through the process of letting him go and came out the other side, only to get him back again.

I didn't think this feeling was one i'd ever recover from. I still adored him, but I couldn't help but think that had more to do with my inability to resist whatever Vampire pheromones it was that they emitted, rather than genuine adoration. I adored all the Cullen's and now realised I almost felt the same way about Edward as I did Jasper and Emmet.

I chewed on my lip as I looked at the letter in my hands, this correspondence hadn't triggered my change of heart, I knew that. But it helped nudge me in the right direction, showed me the feelings I should be having about Edward but instead felt them towards a mysterious letter writer who genuinely cared about my wellbeing.

For a moment I allowed myself to daydream about having a normal human life with whoever was sending me these notes. Having children and a home, enjoying being alive…

But that just wasn't me.

Now that i'd had a glimpse of the world that lay hidden beyond the shadows, I didn't want to pull myself out of it. I knew that one day I wanted to become a Vampire, I just wasn't sure when or if I even wanted Edward to be the one to do it. To be tied to him more irrevocably than I already was didn't hold the same appeal to me anymore. I was my own person and maybe one day I would find someone who appreciated my strength, rather than my weaknesses.

My chest ached as I thought about Edward. I had tried to make it work, through all the pain and suffering he had caused me I had tried not to hold a grudge, to let it go and work on our future. But how could I have a future with someone who so plainly didn't want one with me? Sixty years to him would have passed in the blink of an eye and he didn't want to turn me, so i'd die an old woman and he'd carry on. I knew that because he had sworn to Carlisle never to pull a stunt like that again on the agreement they didn't vote for me to be turned. I frowned in displeasure as I recalled the conversation we'd all had upon our return to Forks.

'_You have chosen not to live without her, you leave me no choice. I wont lose my son.' Carlisle had said, his expression one of beautiful sadness._

_Edward had moved to lean against the banister, gripping it tightly in his hands as he spoke between gritted teeth. 'Fine, I wont do it again. You have my word. Just… Don't agree to this Carlisle, don't do this to me.'_

And so the other Cullen's had followed in Carlisle's lead and decided that they couldn't put Edward through the emotional pain of condemning me. Even though I felt glad now that they had voted no, at the time it had stung. I had been so pumped full of adrenaline and joy at having Edward back by my side that I hadn't stopped to truly think about how I felt.

I smiled sadly as I realised that whilst I had come to the decision to stay human for now on my own just as Edward would have wanted, I had also decided to do so without him.

I remembered something Charlie had said to me once, when i'd asked why he still hadn't moved on from Mom. He had said 'There are some things in life that you just cant bounce back from. Some wounds just cut too deep and until they've healed properly you can't move forward. It would just be like rubbing salt in the wound to try before you're ready.'

That was exactly how I felt about this situation. What Edward had done to me was selfish, he had known the turmoil it would have placed me in and decided to do it anyway. Clearly as time held no significance to him the thought of me pining for a few months meant nothing in the grand scheme of my life. But the problem was that it meant everything. He took my love for him away from me that day in the woods. I had mourned him and now realised that what I had said to him in Volterra really was the truth, I could let him go.

I sighed softly as I tapped the letter against the palm of my hand and gazed out of my window blindly. How was I going to tell him?

My heart ached at the thought of his reaction and I wondered if it had hurt him to leave me at all? If he had felt anything like the way I was feeling now at the very thought of severing ties with him.

I heard the door slam and glanced down to realise Charlie's car was parked out front, I couldn't help but smile as I heard him call through the house.

"Bells? Where are you? Get down here will ya, I've got a present for you."

I rolled my eyes and padded downstairs, watching my step as I held the envelope tightly in my hand. As I stepped into the kitchen i put my hand behind my back to shield it from Charlie's view.

"What present?" I asked, smiling at him genuinely.

He seemed surprised for a minute, his open mouth gaping slightly before he seemed to shake himself out of it and present me with a poorly wrapped package. "I'm glad to see you're enjoying your birthday for once. Have you been anywhere with… anyone today?"

I knew who he was referring to and shook my head as I wedged the envelope between my hip and the kitchen counter, still keeping it hidden from view but freeing my hands so that I could open this gift properly. "No, I've spent the day here reading a book and just enjoying my own company."

Again he looked surprise before brightening considerably. "Well, that's great Bella."

As i peeled back the paper to reveal the gift I shook my head in astonishment, not quite believing Charlie to be this astute.

"If you don't like it I can take it back. I didn't know what to get you and I must have looked a bit helpless in the shop because another guy came to my rescue, asked me what sort of things you liked once i'd explained that I was shopping for you. I told him I'd seen you writing a lot so he suggested this." Charlie rambled on, panic and embarrassment lacing his voice before I shook my head at him and smiled brilliantly, the writing set clutched to my chest.

"No Dad, seriously this is amazing. I just couldn't believe you knew what to get me before I even asked." I shook my head again before something he'd said niggled at me. "Wait, you said another guy helped you? What did he look like?"

I felt my pulse speed up as Charlie frowned whilst he tried to remember. It couldn't have been him, could it?

"Tall with dark hair, was wearing an expensive suit. To be honest Bells I wasn't paying much attention to him through the haze of gift buying panic. He seemed to know what he was talking about though." Charlie rolled his shoulders into a shrug before leaning over to the top of the refrigerator to grab a beer from the surface.

As he strolled into the living room to take his customary seat before the TV I looked down at the set in my hands, pulling the letter from it's hiding place and setting it down next to Charlie's gift. Part of me was tempted to re-write the letter on the paper in my new set, but instead I decided to wait and see if he mentioned it. I needed some clue first that It was him before I asked.

Whilst Charlie was watching the television I slipped outside and placed my letter in its usual place before I joined my Dad on the couch, the gift still held tightly in my hands. He glanced at me from the corner of his eyes before returning his gaze to the screen. If he found me sitting with him strange, he didn't comment on it and instead we enjoyed a companionable silence whilst he watched sports and I tried to picture the tall man with dark hair that he had described to me.

_I'm so glad you're all enjoying this. Don't forget to review with your thoughts._


	6. Chapter 6

_Dearest One,_

_I am greatly humbled and honoured to be considered your friend. I suppose as you have granted me with such a gift, the least I can do is answer such a basic question. I always thought of my favourite colour as a deep, rusted red. But since gazing upon the multitude of colours in your hair whilst bathed in sunlight; I think i may have changed my mind. So, shall we say that my favourite colour is chestnut brown mixed with the slightest tints of red and deep gold, would that suffice?_

_Or perhaps it is the colour of your cheeks when they flush whilst reading my compliments to you. Or even the deep cocoa colour of your eyes as they shine, full of secrets._

_I am afraid my dear, that I have not one favourite colour; but many. It would seem that I have failed spectacularly in answering your question, so I shall grant you another. Consider it a boon, if you will._

_It pains me to hear that you have been frightened and witnessed things that cause your fear. May I ask what, or is that too personal of a question for such newly fledged friends? If it were in my power to do so I would ensure that you were never frightened again._

_No little one, I am not American. I will not tell you where I call home, but you are welcome to try and guess. _

_Yours Eternally._

I let out a soft sigh as I re-read my letter, when someone wrote letters like this how could you not feel something for them? I didn't even know the person behind the pen but I felt like I did, It felt like we had been friends for eternity.

I recognised the feelings in my gut and tried to dampen them. I needed to stop being such a naive child, I had made these mistakes all too often and I wouldn't let myself get swept away by a few pretty words… At least that's what I told myself to try and make myself feel better.

The haste with which I penned my reply made my attempt at mental distance laughable.

_To… you really are going to have to give me something to call you by._

_Deep red sounds nice… It reminds me too much of blood now though, so i'm not very fond of it. I don't know what to say about your compliments, I don't know what you look like so I can hardly return the favor. Thank you for making me feel special, It is always nice to be complimented and as we are friends I can take such compliments seriously without feeling mocked._

_I am happy to be allowed another question, thank you for granting me one! _

_Are you watching me? _

I paused as I wrote this, chewing on the tip of my new pen as I re-read my sentence. Was It too bold and outright to ask such a thing? After all he had promised in his first letter that he wouldn't do such a thing, but now time had passed and letters were being exchanged so quickly. The things he said made me think I was being watched, It didn't frighten me… After all my first boyfriend used to stalk me in my bedroom whilst I was sleeping, at least my pen-pal had respect enough not to break into my home. It just frustrated me that he could be so close and yet I hadn't spotted him. I continued writing, feeling like I had to be honest and so left my question unchanged.

_The things that have frightened me are acts of darkness and depravity. The things that some… types of men and woman can do without remorse or guilt. I have witnessed far more suffering in my life than I would have wished to and believe me, if you could take it all away I would be grateful beyond measure. _

_Judging by the way you write I would say European, you spell certain words differently. I would take a guess at British? Do you have an accent?_

_Will I ever get to meet you?_

_Yours,_

_Bella._

I frowned at my signature. I had never signed myself off that way and I knew it was only polite, but somehow to him it felt more personal than it should. It felt more like a promise.

-o-

I had continued with the rest of my day after leaving the letter in its usual place, still not seeing Edward and instead I managed to get Jacob to talk to me again. Now that I had spoken to him and he knew that I was distancing myself from Edward, he felt more inclined to be my friend again.

I had to admit it felt good being among the pack again, their easy laughter and warmth made everything feel like home, no matter where they were.

By the time I made it home the sky was darkening as the sun slipped away to make room for the moon among the stars. I parked my truck and stepped out, wincing as the door slammed closed behind me. There was no quiet way to shut the door of my rusty old truck, but I loved it.

As I approached the steps I couldn't help but smile as i saw what awaited me. He had replaced my letter with his own again and so I turned and sat on the steps to read it, making sure to unfold it carefully.

_Dearest One,_

_I'm afraid I cannot divulge my real name, for it is quite uncommon and I fear you would begin the search to discover my true identity if I gave it to you. Is 'My Friend' not address enough? I feel it is a worthy and honourable title and I would be delighted to be called such. _

_I apologise for giving you unpleasant thoughts, that was not my intention. Have you seen much bloodshed, for you to be so appalled at the colour of it? As for making you feel special, you are special little one. So special that your greatest gift and downfall is not realising your worth. _

_You are welcome for the extra question but you do not need to thank me. I would grant you the world and anything in it, if it was what you desired. I do not think you are aware of the power you hold over men, for now I shall be grateful for when you discover it I am sure to be doomed. _

_Hm, how to answer your question. It is not my wish to frighten you but my perspective since writing my first letter has changed somewhat. I had originally intended to just be a distant guardian and friend, I had sworn to you I wouldn't watch you and so refrained for as long as I could. When I discovered you weren't receiving my letters I began to watch and wait to see who was taking them, which then lead to my watching you. Forgive me._

_I find it so easy to get lost in observing you, your beauty is such that I cannot tear myself away now that I have gazed upon it again. _

_I don't think I could stop if you asked it of me, though I would of course try. _

_I hope you are not afraid, I would never wish for you to fear me. Especially after discovering you already fear so much. I could take it all away, if you truly wished it. But that is a conversation for another time perhaps, when you are ready. _

_You are half correct, but I am not British._

_I do not believe I have an accent, but then who ever believes that of themselves? I think you have an accent because you do not originate from the same part of the world as I._

_In answer to your question, to your delicate American ears; yes I would have an accent._

_Yours Eternally._

_P.S- I am greatly appreciative of the new stationary. A gift perhaps?_

I laughed and shook my head as I read the last line. It had to have been him at the store! I couldn't believe how blatant he was, to approach Charlie like that. The things he was saying though, it made me feel like I was missing an important clue to his identity. '_I could take it all away, if you truly wished it. But that is a conversation for another time perhaps, when you are ready.__' _

I frowned, ready for what?

I briefly glanced up at the tree line, more out of habit than anything before I stopped dead, sure I had seen something. I squinted and scanned again.

There!

A flash of white in the darkness, barely visible behind the trees.

My heart rate sped up as I stood, the letter dangling from my fingertips as my feet carried me forward almost without permission.

Bella what are you doing, it's almost dark and you're wandering into the woods on the chance he's in there?

It has to be him, he said that he had been watching me, that he couldn't stop. He clearly waited to watch me receive the letter. I had to know who it was.

My legs propelled me forward at a run and as I reached the tree line I stopped and gazed in. It looked so dark in there and I swallowed thickly as fear crept up my throat and made it tighten.

I was sure I was being watched, I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck standing on end, but it was so dark now that I could barely see past the first few trees in front of me. I let out a huff of annoyance and turned on my heel to head back toward the house, irritated at myself for being a coward.

I had never been afraid of the woods before I had met Edward Cullen.

I didn't think I was afraid of what lay within the trees though, I think I was afraid of truly discovering my pen pal's identity. The way he spoke and the language he used made me think of someone else whose identity I had once been trying to discover.

I couldn't help but keep hearing the first thought that had echoed through my head once i'd glimpsed that flash of white within the trees and I didn't want to think about it, because that made it real.

That thought was the one thing I was afraid of and yet longed for.

It whispered around my head traitorously.

'_Vampire.'_


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Well done to those of you who noticed a deliberate lack of Cullen's in the previous chapters. This chapter goes a bit of the way to explaining why.

Weeks had passed and I still hadn't managed to muster enough courage to write a reply. My mind was still consumed with the thought it had been focussed on that evening. That my new friend could be a Vampire.

I'd had a niggling feeling in the back of my skull since the first letter, the language he used and way he spoke sounded like he was from a completely different time. Even more so than Edward. I had re-read all of the letters and now that I was looking for it, I could see the hints that he had dropped here and there. Now I really was afraid.

To try and block the thoughts from my mind I had begun spending more time with the Cullen family again. No matter what they had done to me, they were still my friends. They would have been my family. Edward had continued behaving like a timid puppy around me and the most we touched was when he kissed me on the forehead to say goodbye of an evening. It was chaste and friendly, and whilst his touch used to ignite me in so many ways now it just felt like a goodbye between friends.

If he had noticed, he hadn't said anything.

It was a cold evening at the Cullen's as autumn and winter were beginning to meet with a vengeance. I pulled my jumper around me tightly as I shivered slightly, the Cullen's had no need for central heating or fires and had conveniently forgotten about my human need for heat. So I huddled close to myself on the plush sofa and blinked at the Vampires surrounding me. I had been asked to attend a meeting of sorts, apparently my presence was needed as I'd been kept out of the loop with a few things. I had a feeling I knew what it regarded… I was still friends with Jake after all and I knew they were struggling to catch the red-headed Vampire on their lands.

"Bella." Carlisle smiled as he looked down at me, his blond hair flopped appealingly over his brow. "We have decided it is the appropriate time to tell you what our actions have been since Italy to secure your safety."

He looked around at his family and most wore pleasant expressions as they looked at me, Rosalie looked like she'd rather be anywhere else.

"As you know Victoria has held a vendetta against you for what happened to James. We have been doing our utmost to protect you from her, but now she has developed a different plan. One that endangers us all. Not just from attack but also from the Volturi's retaliation."

I felt myself sit straighter at the mention of the Volturi. I glanced worriedly at Edward who looked as though he might reach for my shoulder to reassure me, before he looked pained and glanced in the other direction.

"Victoria is creating a newborn army to avenge James." Carlisle looked down at me, worry creasing his perfect brow. "Newborns are uncontrollable, volatile and extremely powerful."

"Wait. Sorry Carlisle, but how long has she been doing this? I've heard nothing about her for months!" I tried to keep the note of accusation from my voice, but judging but the purse in Carlisle's lips I didn't quite manage it.

"We have been tracking her since your return from Italy. Edward thought you would be safer not knowing. Alice saw a vision and we were informed by the Volturi that if we did not take action, then they would. You can understand why having the Volturi here would be very bad."

"For you." Rosalie muttered, her eyes glazed over as she gazed out of the window in boredom.

"For all of us, Rose." Carlisle said, turning to his adopted daughter. "If they discovered we had not kept our word, our fate would be worse than Bella's. I wanted to ask what your thoughts on being turned were, if they'd changed at all?"

I squeezed my arms as I tried to feed warmth into my body, not quite sure how to answer him. "I… Don't think I want to be changed anymore." I said tentatively, deciding that the truth was the best course of action.

Rose looked surprised and yet pleased, for the first time since I had met her. Whilst the others all looked shocked, except Edward, Carlisle and Alice. Carlisle smiled at me softly.

"I thought as much. Edward had informed me of your change of heart."

Carlisle looked at Edward for a moment, not saying anything before Edward nodded once. That was when I realised he was communicating with him via Edward's ability, just to be sure I was _allowed_ to be told, I thought bitterly.

"The Volturi are in Seattle. They decided they had given us long enough to sort out the problem and so have come here to do it themselves." He bowed his head in apology before continuing. "I'm sorry Bella but I couldn't risk my family in a war with newborns, especially where we are outnumbered."

I glanced around the room feeling panic beginning to rise in my chest. "So the Volturi are coming and there's nothing I can do?" I shook my head in disbelief. "Well, isn't this great. You dragged me into this mess." I turned to Edward, shaking with anger as I accused him. "And now you're going to hide away whilst I face the consequences."

Edward shook his head. "No Bella, I will stay by your side always. I won't let them hurt you."

I rolled my eyes at his predictable self sacrifice. "Great, and then you'll die too."

I looked at the Cullen's, not quite believing that they'd let their son and brother take such an action. I was right.

"I have reason to believe that the Volturi wont attack." Alice spoke up, her eyes shifting from Carlisle to Edward and back again. Edwards grip on the arm of the seat tightened before he shook his head at her.

"Alice, what is it?" I asked leaning forward feeling excited but not quite knowing why.

"Aro is interested in you." Alice said cautiously, her eyes flicking to Edward who looked like he was ready to leap at her. "He has been-"

"Alice, ENOUGH." Edward stood quickly, his eyes flashing gold as he faced off with Alice.

"She deserves to know!"

I looked between them both at the silent battle they were having, when suddenly Alice went limp and her eyes distanced. Jasper was at her side in a second holding her upright and whispering in her ear soothingly. When she came back from her vision her mouth was set in a grim line and she looked at Edward pleadingly. He only shook his head once and watched her, looking like he was waiting for her to make a decision. She sighed softly and sat down and I had the distinct feeling that i'd missed something.

"He has been interested in your potential power, if you were to become immortal." She said in a resigned manner and I couldn't help but think that she had changed what she was going to tell me, due to whatever decision Edward had made if she did so. "You'd be too valuable to kill."

I stood and looked around the room, knowing that everyone in here knew something I didn't. Even Esme wouldn't meet my eyes.

"You're lying to me." I said accusingly. "You all are and until you're going to tell me the truth, I want nothing to do with you." I turned on my heel and stalked from the room, grateful to be moving so I could get some heat into my chilled bones. Edward made to follow me before I turned and glared at him. "That means you too, you're lying to me more than anyone else in this room and I'm sick of being kept in the dark. Just leave me alone."

I felt exhaustion overwhelm me as I left, my small human ears only picking up half the conversation they were having as I departed.

"You'll just push her further away if you keep lying to her." It was Carlisle, I presumed he was talking to Edward. I started down the steps to the front door and just caught Edwards reply.

"If that's what It takes for her to be kept away from _him._ Then that's what i'll do."


End file.
